The Christmas List

“I need your list…” my mother threatens me again as if that will make me suddenly create a list in my mind of materialistic items I desire.  Sure, I could probably come up with a list of fashionable, practical, designer and beautiful things that would be nice to have. But, I don’t need any of it. It’s becoming a reoccurring theme year after year, getting worse with age.

The truth is, there is nothing materialistic I actually desire over the simple things in life. It’s all just stuff. Clutter. Dust collectors that make me feel anxious and trapped. There isn’t really anything people can buy for me that makes me feel ‘good.’ I am sure this could be read as bratty, like I am never happy, nothing is ever good enough. But, I promise it’s nothing like that. Sure, things are nice to have. It’s nice to have nice clothes, beautiful shoes, lots of things to fill a home. I just don’t want it. It’s not for me. I am happy and content with the small amount of items I do own. I spend almost all my time at the studio or adventuring so the least amount of ‘things’ weighing me down, the better in my opinion.

I text back again, “I want adventures. I want to travel and see the world.”  My mother, familiar with that response, responds with a sigh and a silly emoji. But hey, she asked.

What I really want this season is simple. To travel more, to worry less. To figure life out. To spend more days doing what I love and less time on things that upset me. I want to fuel the fire in my heart that keeps me going. I want to continue to live a life that isn’t deemed conventional.  I wish to continue to cross things off my bucket list, and to find those hidden jewels in the world. I want to keep growing in the love I’ve found, and share the joy that it brings to me. Yes, what I want most cannot be purchased or wrapped up under the tree;

I want another year filled of happiness, travel, love and adventure.

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